Re-Typing Five Pages of Kenneth Goldsmith’s “Fidget” [with context].

[Friday, November 16, 2012, lunchtime. Sam Nunn Federal Center, Atlanta, Georgia. Sitting at desk using Dell D600 laptop, Core i7 processor and Microsoft Word 2007. Eating 6-oz carton Chobani non-fat black cherry Greek yogurt, 12-oz can Diet Dr. Pepper, handful Planter’s Extra Large Virginia Peanuts, 6-pack Lance Toasty Crackers with real peanut butter and 0 grams trans-fat.]

nward eson morf riA. Esolc sregniF . daerpS .eson morf sevom woblE  .snepo dnah thgiR  .stcartnoc gel tfeL  .deb morf sesir eenk thgiR  .deb morf sesir eenk tfeL  .tfel stsurht sivleP  seenk ta nethgiarts sgeL  .ni smrA  .stcartnoc redluohS  .lruf sregniF  .stcartnoc smrA  .sliart sbmuhT  .spit sessim riaH  daeh fo edis diova sregnif fo spit  .srae revocnU  .swaj morf evom sdnaH  .gnirps sbmuhT  .kcen esaeler sregniF  .sport woblE  .waj morf yawa hsup sdnah fo sleeH  .kcen morf evom sdnah fo kcaB  .lruf sdnah  .kcen fo edis morf evom selkcunK  .stsurht woble [stop, dredge fruit up from bottom of yogurt, eat bite] ghgiR  .redluohs thgir morf sevom tsiF  .selcunk sbur bmuhT   .snepo dnah thgiR  .drawnwod snrut woblE  .kcen sdiova tsiF [Munch peanuts, sip drink.]  .specib morf sevom bmuhT.  Redluouhs morf sevom bmuhT  .snethgiarts woblE  .nepO.  esaeler sregniferoF  . sexaler bmuhT  .swercskroc mlaP  .htuom fo roiretni sretne eugnoT  .gniliec morf yawa woble stsurht tsiwt esiwkcolcretnuoC  .sdneb mrA  .daeh fo kcab morf yawa wollip sehsurb mra thgir thgiartS  .sport daeH  .wollawS  .tcartnoC  .dnirG  .xaler swaJ  .wollawS  .pil fo cra gniwollof tfel ot htuom fo edis thgir morf gnivom pil reppu ssorca snur eugnoT Eyelids close.


[Stop to check ModPo forums using Mozilla browser. “Breakfast Club” comes up. Newest comment:  Tracy’s lunch poem made her hungry … though not remotely for any foods she listed. She is on her lunch break.” Check Gmail; check Facebook. Print out checklist for 1:30 teleconference. Drop peanut on floor. Crawl under desk to retrieve. Pop in mouth.]

Eyelids open. Tongue runs across upper lip moving from left side of mouth to right following arc of lip. Swallow. Jaws clench. Grind. Stretch. Swallow. Head lifts. Bent right arm brushes pillow into back of head. Arm straightens. Counterclockwise twist thrusts elbow toward ceiling. Tongue leaves interior of mouth, passing through teeth. Tongue slides back into mouth. Palm corkscrews. Thumb stretches. Forefingers wrap. Clench. Elbow bends. Thumb moves toward shoulder. Joint of thumb meets biceps. Elbow turns upward as knuckles of fist jam neck. Right hand clenches. Thumb rubs knuckles. Fist to right shoulder. Right elbow thrusts. Knuckles touch side of neck. Hands unfurl. Backs of hands press against flat of neck. Heels of hands push into jaw. Elbows raise. Fingers wrap around neck. Thumbs tuck. Hands move toward jaw. Cover ears. Tips of fingers graze side of head. Hairs tickle tips as they pass. Thumbs train behind fingers. Arms extend. Fingers unfurl. Shoulder stretches. Arms out. Legs bend at knees. Pelvis thrusts right. Left knee drops to bed. Right knee drops to bed. Left leg extends. Right hand grabs. Elbow moves toward nose. Thumb and forefinger pinch, wiping mucus from lip. Mucus pools in right nostril. Wipes. Index binger blocks right nostril. Exhale. Mucus out of right nostril. Elbow extends. Fingers open. Forefinger caresses outside of thumb.


[Leave workstation to visit men’s room before 1:30 teleconference. Return from men’s room and certify bi-weekly timesheet in database. Review checklist for 1:30 teleconference. Throw lunch trash in wastebasket. Close door of office. Conduct 1:30 teleconference.]

grasps using thumb, middle finger and index finger. Moves to thigh. Grasp. Lift. Thrust forward. Left hand probes anus then rubs thigh. Right hand moves toward mouth. Lips open. Swallow. Hands meet. Fingers intertwine. Thumbs stretch, barely touching one another. Head bows. Bridge of nose meets joined thumbs. Thumbs separate and apply pressure to sides of nose. Tips of thumbs rest on tear ducts. Right elbow flicks. Thumbs apply strong pressure to tear ducts. Thumb and forefinger grasp. Thumbs apply pressure. Breathe in. Breathe out. Arm extends. Thumb and forefinger grasp. Press. Fingers open. Thumb leads, forefinger follows. Flips. Gully between thumb and forefinger cradles. Hand drops. Wrist twists counterclockwise. Swift peck, up and down. Stroke toward body. Moves clockwise. Wrist twists counterclockwise. Pecks. Moves right, parallel to chest. Hand moves two hundred twenty-five degrees toward left breast, parallel to chest. Strokes away from body forty-five degrees. Strokes toward body one hundred eighty degrees. Strokes parallel to body. Both hands lift. Left hand grasps. Right thumb drops. Hand lifts. Releases. Left index finger applies pressure. [Outlook e-mail notification flashes in lower right corner of screen.] Arms stretch. Ribs thrust. Buttocks slide. Right hand grasps and moves to mouth. Left hand twists public hair clockwise. [Notice that original has “public” not “pubic” hair.]  Lips open.


[Office housekeeper, Regina, knocks on door, opens, apologizes. I wave her in to take trash. She does and recloses door.] one thirty-secondth of an inch apart. Thumbs move one sixty-fourth of an inch apart. Thumbs touch. Hands rest on belly. Heartbeat in belly. Inhale. Belly rises. Exhale. Belly drops. Left palm up. Right hand grasps right foot. Left hand grasps right foot. Foot pulled up facing face. Right hand lurks over side of foot. Toes intermingle with fingers. Arms outstretch, cradle foot. Pressure on elbow joints. Right foot and leg perpendicular to body and arm. Arms parallel. Fingertips trip in on tops of hands. Veins in right arm bulge. Elbow digs into right hip. Biceps flex. Foot against inside of forearm. Left hand grasps right forearm. Foot to face. Right big toe touches center of forehead. Tip of nose touches tip of foot. Release. Mouth closes around tip of big toe. Big toe enveloped by mouth. Big toe covered in saliva. Foot released. Stretch. Left hand grabs left foot. Right arm brings left foot to nose. Big toe of left foot touches tip of nose. Tip of foot rubs bottom of nose. Thigh muscles stretch. Foot shifts right, parallel to body., six inches from bellybutton. Three inches from bellybutton. Right hand grasps left foot and turns counterclockwise. Right meat of thumb meets ball of right foot. Right fingers grasp left toes. Wrap and stretch. Toes pull inward. Meat of right hand pushes right toes backward. Four toes bend perpendicular to foot. Right big toe twists ninety degrees to foot. Hands on chest. Eyes close. Yawn. Swallow.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           59

[Get up from desk, open door of office. Leave again for men’s room and to stretch legs. Return. Sit down. Check ModPo Forum using Mozilla browser. Drop Diet Dr. Pepper can in recycle bin after twisting off tab and putting in shirt pocket.]  Back arches. Foot falls. Knees bend. Body weight shifts to left foot. Hand extends and grasps. Foot falls to right. Foot falls to left. Outside of foot falls. Foot flattens. Toe veins flatten. Muscles flex. Relax. Foot flattens. Widens. Hell down. Flat foot. Heel down. Flat foot. Heel down. Flat foot. Heel down. Flat foot. Right heel. Flat right foot. Left heel. Left flat foot. Left hand raises and grasps. Passes to right hand. Thumb, middle finger and forefinger hold body. Turn.  Arm drops. Walk. Knees bend. Hands graze knees. Right elbow out. Knees straighten. Body turns. Left hand opens. Fingers extend. Right hand opens. Fingers extend. Right foot propels body. Slinks into crouching position. Weight on balls of feet. Arms outstretch. Right hand grasps. Left hand opens. Left hand receives. Right hand grasps. Pushes. Right hand grasps. Body extends. Stretches. Turns. Right foot. Left foot. Pivot. Palm up. Hip thrusts out. Left hip pushes. Turns. Slinks down. Right hand grasps. Right hand grasps. Releases. Right hand grasps. Left foot shifts slightly toward right. Right leg saddles perpendicular to left foot. Left toenails dig into flesh of right leg. Move back and for repeatedly. Right hand grasps. Body slides. Hand opens. Left hand grasps. Turns. Pushes away.


[Proofread and correct. Especially difficult for page 87. Save file in MS Word 2007. Select all text. Copy. Paste in new thread in ModPo forum. Tediously clean up formatting.]


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